Why Don’t We Listen to a Loved Ones Wishes?

If your loved one made a wish-do you abide by it? Do you listen to it? Do you approve of it?

If you don’t agree. Do you resend it with excuses? Do you excuse it based on your own perceptions?

As a nurse, we are greeted with a lot of differences. It could be a different belief from a patient to a nurse, from nurse to nurse, from doctor to patient. But it can also be a different belief and wish from patient and their family. I am talking about end of life discussion.

Some people do not want to talk about it. Everyone should talk about it. Some believe, that maybe if we don’t talk about it-maybe it will not happen? But we all know, we are guaranteed two things in life 1) birth and 2) death. Everything in-between is not set in stone.

If a person is of sound mind and the make a decision that they do not want any extraordinary measures-why is it morally okay for a family member to come into the picture and reverse it when the person loses consciousness.

Even with written documentation, it appears to happen every single day in healthcare. I wonder how this can be okay? How can this be legal? How can it be changed? ::it is often legal because family members will say “they were not of sound mind when they agreed to that” even if they were::

I will tell you, my best friend is my healthcare proxy. She is in the medical field. If there is a point in no return, don’t keep going. Just let me go. I will tell you-if you (my best friend, my family, etc) go against my sound mind wishes…when I’m dead-I will come back and haunt you.

I understand hoping for more. I understand wanting more. I understand guilt, regret, sadness, grief. But is it okay to put your wishes ahead of your loved ones?

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Rose hospice nurse
    Oct 24, 2015 @ 04:01:21

    Never ever, ever.

    Like

    Reply

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